You Can’t Fake This.
Someone asked me how I stay so positive… even in the middle of grief.
Not in a “quote on a coffee mug” kind of way.
In a real, day-to-day, still-hurts kind of way.
I told them I have a very specific ritual most mornings.
Because if I wait until the grief hits full force… it’s already too late.
Yes, you need tools to pull yourself out of a tailspin.
But for me, the real work is proactive.
It’s how I start the day.
Not how I try to recover from it after.
They asked me,
“So… is it like a fake it till you make it thing?”
I hate that phrase.
And I didn’t fully realize why until they said it.
Because you can’t fake your mindset.
You can sit there repeating,
“I’m happy, I’m happy, I’m happy…”
But if you’re not, your brain knows.
It calls BS immediately.
So instead of trying to jump straight to “happy”…
I look for something smaller.
Moments.
Tiny ones.
A breath that feels a little lighter.
A conversation that feels normal.
A second where I’m not completely swallowed by it.
And I pay attention to those.
Because those moments matter more than we give them credit for.
They show you something important…
The pain isn’t everything.
It’s part of the day… not the whole day.
Some days, yeah — it takes up most of the space.
But it’s never all of it.
And sometimes “happy” isn’t even realistic.
Sometimes the goal is just…
Calm.
Steady.
A little bit of peace.
That’s enough for right now.
Then from there… I build.
Not with fake beliefs… but with ones my mind can actually believe.
The small ones.
I made it through today.
I’m getting stronger, even if it’s slow.
I can handle this moment.
That’s where it starts.
It’s like lifting weights.
You don’t walk in and throw up 100 pounds.
You start small.
You build strength over time.
Same thing here.
Better thoughts aren’t forced.
They’re practiced.
And over time…
You go from feeling terrible all the time
→ to feeling terrible sometimes
→ to having moments where you can breathe
→ to actually feeling okay sometimes
→ to… eventually… feeling good again.
That’s the progression.
Not overnight.
But it’s real.
So if you’re in it right now…
Don’t chase happiness.
Just find the next better feeling thought.
That’s it.
And if you’re having trouble finding it…
I’ve got you.
Go with power,
Jason
Try this Simple Practice:
A Better Thought Practice
1. Pick your thought
“I’m getting stronger, even if it’s slow.”
“I can handle this moment.”
“All I need is within me now.”
2. Put your hands on your heart
Take 10 slow, deep breaths.
3. Repeat the thought
Say it in your mind as you breathe… 10 times.
4. Go look for proof
Move through your day and notice the moments where that thought is actually true.
That’s the practice.