The Lessons from Crème Brûlée French Toast
Kindness asks me to listen to what I need, then choose a way to give it to myself.
This weekend, I was teaching at a yoga retreat in Massachusetts. Breakfast included crème brûlée French toast.
And I ate a lot of it.
It was delicious. But when I finished, I felt overstuffed. So I got curious: Why did I do that?
I had a long day of teaching ahead. I wanted to resource my body. That intention was real.
The way I carried it out? A little off. I ate so much that I felt less ready for the day I was trying to prepare for.
I could have been “nice” to myself and said, “It's fine. Don't think about it.” Or I could have beaten myself up.
Neither would have helped me listen to my body.
Kindness asks a little more of me. I can enjoy the French toast, notice when I've had enough, and have the discipline to stop. That's a way of caring for the person who still has a whole day of teaching ahead.
And it made me think about the choices we make when life changes.
After my sister Lauren died, I went back to work soon after her funeral. I needed to think about something other than her death for a while.
Was that avoidance? Possibly. I can understand why I made that choice and still wonder whether working was giving me the kind of break I needed.
There are millions of ways to turn our attention toward something else. Exercise. A hobby. Finding a cause that matters to us. Some people try a cold plunge. Work may be one of those ways, too.
But how do we feel afterward? More resourced? Or just further away from what our body has been asking us to notice?
I'm not suggesting we need to sit with grief every minute of the day. Sometimes a break is exactly what we need. The invitation is to notice whether the way we take that break actually serves the reason we wanted it.
What are you doing to take care of yourself right now?
And is it giving you what you actually need?
Go with Power,
Jason
Somatic Grief Therapist
Try this Simple Practice:
Three Steps to Match Your Action to Your Intention
1. Name the Why
What am I hoping this choice will give me right now? Energy, relief, rest, connection, or a little room to breathe?
2. Check With Your Body
Afterward, what do I notice? Do I feel more able to meet the day, or less?
3. Adjust With Kindness
What's one small change that would help my action match my intention next time?
No scolding required. Just honesty, kindness, and maybe a little discipline.
Healing doesn’t always happen sitting still. Sometimes it begins with taking the next step. Join us for Walking with Grief™ this October in the Adirondacks.