The Power of a Compelling Future
A compelling future isn't something you find. It's something you choose to create.
Those of you who know me know that I'm a lone wolf. I have a tendency to do things on my own before bringing other people into the mix.
There are times when that's an asset, and other times when it slows me down.
The other day, I was running my normal route at my normal pace—keeping to myself and following my own rhythm. Then, out of nowhere, this tiny person blew past me as if I were standing still.
Usually, when that happens, I find all the excuses in the world to explain it away.
They're younger (that's one I use a lot). They're taller. They have longer legs. They're only running a short distance. My list of excuses goes on and on.
This person had none of those things. They looked to be about the same age as I am (or so I think), their legs were shorter than mine, and they showed no signs of stopping—or even slowing down.
What happened next reminded me of something I already know to be true.
Having a clear point of focus allows us to go farther, faster.
Up until that moment, I had been watching my heart rate, my speed, and my distance. But as soon as that runner zipped by, my speed increased, my heart rate climbed, and before I knew it, I was running farther and faster than I had been just moments before.
This is exactly what happens when we go through a major life transition, like losing someone we love. The vision we had for our future gets shattered.
That single point of focus disappears, and suddenly we're wandering, unsure of what the next step should be.
This is where building a support system becomes so important.
Surround yourself with people who will help you create a new vision for what your future can become. Support comes in many forms—a peer support group, a therapist, a coach, or simply moving your body through yoga, running, the gym, kickboxing, or dancing. It can also come through creative outlets like writing, painting, singing, or even coloring.
These are the things that help you rebuild a future that is compelling to you. A future that, when life gets tough, gives you something to focus on—even if it isn't here yet. That vision is what pulls you forward.
It's also important to surround yourself with people who are already getting the results you want to achieve. You wouldn't hire a fitness coach who has no track record of helping others and doesn't follow their own advice. Find people who are playing at a higher level than you. They'll challenge you, inspire you, and help you become better.
There's an old saying:
"If you want to go fast, go alone.
If you want to go far, go with others."
If you're navigating a major life transition and you're struggling to see what's next, you don't have to figure it out alone. Sometimes all it takes is someone to help you create a new, compelling vision for your future.
If that sounds like something you need, I'd love to help. Reach out anytime. Let's start building the future that's waiting for you.
Go with power,
Jason
Somatic Grief Therapist
Try this Simple Practice:
Finding Focus Practice
1. Picture Your Future
Close your eyes for a minute and ask yourself:
"If life felt just a little better six months from now, what would be different?"
Don't worry about how. Just notice what comes to mind.
2. Choose One Direction
From everything you pictured, pick one thing that matters most right now.
Ask yourself:
"If I could only make progress in one area, what would it be?"
Your focal point might be your health, relationships, purpose, finances, or simply finding joy again.
3. Take One Tiny Step Today
Ask:
"What's one small action I can take today that moves me toward that future?"
Make it so small you can't talk yourself out of it.
Call one friend.
Go for a 10-minute walk.
Write one page in a journal.
Schedule an appointment.
Read one chapter of a book.
Then do it.
Healing doesn't always happen sitting still. Sometimes it begins with taking the next step. Join us for Walking with Grief™ this October in the Adirondacks.